So my husband and I have been playing a game that I will call "Hide the Poo." Its not nearly as disgusting as it sounds, but it is probably more immature than either of us would like to think about. He got this little plastic piece of poo from one of his work friends as part of their Christmas card. Don't ask. These are the kind of work friends he has.
So one day, I happened to be a little irritated with him for some reason - I don't remember why. I have a feeling it had to with him never putting away his laundry and/or leaving his giant size twelves on our bedroom floor. I mean, two of his shoes cover like half of the available floor space in our small ass room. And the hall closet where we keep our shoes is no more than 3 feet from where he leaves them...but I digress. Its also possible we had bickered before he left for work. Who knows. Anyway, after he leaves for work, I'm in our room tidying up, feeling pissed, when I find the piece of poo hidden in my book. And it totally makes me smile and remember once again why I love him. And I proceed to hide the poo on top of his toothbrush in the medicine cabinet.
And the poo has gone back and forth several times since - my underwear drawer, on top of his cell phone. It hadn't moved for about two weeks because the last spot I put it in was inside HIS book. Unbeknownst to me, he was already done reading it so he didn't even notice it until I asked him if I could borrow the book when he was done. In fact, I had forgotten I had even put it there because I get dumber by the minute and can't remember anything that I don't write down. After he left for work this evening, I go out to change a load of laundry and its in the door handle of the dryer. It scared the shit out of me (pun intended). Well played G$, well played. I have now put the poo in a GREAT spot (which I will not write because he might read this).
So what's the big deal with this stupid plastic poo and the hiding it game? Because its funny. And stupid. Its the kind of thing we would have done to each other when we first started dating. Back when we made each other laugh nonstop. Before "for better or for WORSE" (and the worse came quick for us dammit). Before we became parents who are totally wrapped up and in love with their son, which is wonderful but also makes for A LOT less time for us to love on each other. Before G$ became our sole provider and some weeks works so many hours we hardly even see each other. Before I became a stay at home mom who gets crabby when her husband comes home from work and messes up the house she tried to clean and keep tidy all day.
We get so few moments that are for just US or about just US. And I'm not complaining. The reason for that is our son and the choices we have made about me staying at home. I wouldn't change the way things are for the world. But I can see now how parents can lose themselves and how staying connected gets harder or things get stale or whatever. Being "Mom" and "Dad" eat up so much of the pie graph of who you are that "Wife" and "Husband" can get the shaft. I don't think we're THERE, I don't think our relationship is in any trouble, but I can SEE how it happens to people.
"Hide the Poo" is OURS. Not that anybody else would want it..... but its a stupid little thing WE do. Even if it only takes 30 seconds to find a good hiding spot, that was 30 seconds we spent trying to make the other person laugh.
What kept things fresh? Kept us laughing? What kept us out of marriage counseling? A plastic piece of poo. Awesome.